This series shows photographs taken in December 2021 of the walls in the compound of my home in Ibadan, Nigeria. The walls have been painted for a while and the colour of the paint has washed off over time. After the cemented wall beneath was revealed in different patterns, I realised that there was a kind of subtle beauty in the result.

To come home for the holidays after a really hectic year was such a relief. I went through a series of depressive and anxiety episodes in 2021 that made me feel like I was lost. It was a painful process of shedding parts of myself to reveal who I was. I was just getting to understand what being queer meant for me as a Muslim and as someone who lives in a country where homophobia prevails and queerness is criminalised. I struggled to find my place in all the chaos of my existence, and in all that struggling and fighting, I could not find my voice for a while. I was not able to write as much as I used to or connect with works as I used to.

Seeing the paint fade off the walls brought beauty back to my soul. I could see myself in the walls, and everything I felt was summarised in a glance at the pictures I took. I could feel all the mess of me represented in truth.